The Year That Was

Yay! I'm blogging again. I really don't know but I lost interest in writing. I can still remember, 10 years ago, I was very motivated to write. I used to have blogspot and multiply and I didn't do cross-posting. My posts in blogspot were different from my multiply. Well, that's another story.

2010 was a roller coaster ride for me. But I never expect, that, my pamily is the most important persons in my life. Teynk you. Ay mali! Hahahahaha! See, I can't write anymore. Beep! Beep! Seryoso na... There was a point in my life where I just realized that I wasn't happy because I was not focusing on the things that should make me happy. I longed for the things that I know I can never get. As a result, I always get frustrated. I envy. Now I want change. They say to count your blessings; to focus on what you have and enjoy it. I'll try to do it. I hope I could be consistent.

I will always hope for and expect the best. If things won’t work out as I have originally hoped or expected, then I'll figure that there must be reason for it and will look to learn from the event itself. Will I ever be disappointed? Sure. But disappointments are one of the ways we learn and one of life’s ways of teaching us. When we are able to maintain a perspective of learning from all of life’s events, then we can see the value in each of our disappointments too.

And this is not just about hoping and expecting, this is a thank you note to everyone who remembered and a good learning experience that anyone who wishes to be happy should forget the things and people that make them sad and instead stick to the people that loves you and will always be there, through the good and bad. Again, one more year has passed but as I have mentioned to my friend, I think I’m not getting older, but instead, I’m getting better and better each year. Thanks again to everyone and may we all have a luckier year this 2011.

Go with the Flow

Lately, things have started to work out for me; work still sucks but my supervisor is easier to handle now than before; home life has been great; I'm also starting to reconnect with my long-lost friends; And a new gadget is (still miles away) about to be mine.

Actually, I don't know what to write. Argh! The reason why I have this blog is because I want to use this cool template that looks like Facebook. I don't have the motivation to write yet. Maybe soon. And... I also want to have my own web address, my own dotcom. I think it's cool to own one. Anyone who wants to give it as a Christmas gift? :)

To those who visited my Tumblr, thank you. And I'm sorry for not updating it often. I've been struggling with my schedule at work. Sometimes when I'm at home, I prefer to sleep or watch tv series than to open my laptop and work on blogging. Why am I so lazy to blog?!

Ahh, I'll stop now. Non-sense entry. Sorry. Hahahahahaha!

To A New Beginning

Originally posted: February 20, 2010.


I have been counting days, nights, but it doesn’t seem to end. All the longing, the bitterness, the what-ifs and what-could-have-been’s can’t be easily dismissed. A year’s worth of whatever you may call that, isn’t easy to put to waste, and you’re not that easy to forget…

I’ve thrown myself into believing every deceit and lie you’ve brought, but it didn’t matter to me. Why? I don’t know. I’ve kept my hopes high, which I shouldn’t have. Then I realized that in our world, we don’t cling on false hopes, never expect too much and never let the cheap thrills of attraction cloud our judgments. I was gullible, but I wasn’t stupid.

You may have caused me pain, but it’s on me. Whatever it is I’ve put myself through, it’s on me. If you’ve decided to go your way, then it’s time for me to find my own. But I’ll never forget whatever it is we had, or if it meant anything to you. I know it wasn’t that big a deal for you, and likewise, I shouldn’t make a deal out of it.

I’m a work in progress, whatever it is I still have to go through, I’ll get there… in time. This is me letting go. Time heals, and forgives. It may not be now, but soon we’ll get there.

Had I known things will turn out that way, I shouldn’t have made myself vulnerable. I never should have told you things, and most of all, I never should have given you my trust. But this is a learning process for me. “We love, we get hurt, and we hurt others in return”.

Then again, I count for days and nights, pretending everything’s okay, as if you’re just a figment of my imagination that lingers me in solitude. I’m looking forward to the day that I’ll have to stop counting and reminiscing. When that day comes, that I find someone new, you’ll just be a part of yesterday, who never made it to my future…